Is love larger than life ?

A rush of adrenaline through the veins, increased pumping of heart beat, enhanced pulse rate, restlessness and a series of chemical reactions with the hormones are the basic symptoms of the feeling which is larger than life, called love. This is a complex feeling combined with emotions, affection, and attachment which becomes stronger with each passing day. Everyone tries to feel this unfathomable, inexplicable, yet a beautiful strange thing. This is the feeling which every human passes through at least once in his lifetime. A smile, gentle touch sends chill down the spine, heightens the level of anxiety, boosts the metabolism and is capable of doing a lot more biological changes… ;)

People in love feel the whole world is at their feet, they live in a different world.. their own kingdom where they are the rulers. They spend the whole day thinking about their partners. It completely rules their mind.. People start liking all the things that are either red or pink. I really wonder what’s up with the color thing.. But it is true, everyone does this. Girls spend more time admiring themselves at the mirror, gazing at their wardrobe for hours, a small pimple on their cheeks can give sleepless nights and the guys start taking care of their hairstyle, of late they start changing their wardrobe, go to parlors and seek homely treatments from their mother or sister. They get rebellious if anything comes in their way, get filmy.

Bullshit… !! Isn’t it? Life does feel rosy during those days but slowly the rosiness starts fading. We always tend to look at the best thing and we want the best thing to happen. Eventually lovers start finding flaws in their Partners. Girls expect their man to be a Super Hero kind of a man who should excel in all aspects where as Guys expects the girl to be caring and the most beautiful woman on earth ever. The sweet thing called love starts turning sour. It picks up with small fights and ends up with an ugly break-up.

But the most interesting fact is that every human knows these simple facts, yet they want to fall in love, feel the charm, the pain at least once in life. Why is it that every one craves for it? Is it really special, heavenly and ecstatic? Hmm.. Do we have to try it out? Life is perhaps short to taste all its varieties.. Lets taste all the varieties before they turn insipid. What say, haan?

Pleading hard... Hope HE cares !!!

Dear God, Why is it me all the time????? Does that make sense to you??? How can you play with me always, haven’t you prepared any strategy, a plan for my life, my future before dumping me in this world?? How can you be so careless? Ah! You are disappointing me and it is very frustrating me now…God, do you hear me????????

I don’t know how and why this happens, the reason for my unplanned sufferings are hitting me hard these days. I am clueless like a kid in an unknown city. I am stretching my hand blindly for someone to catch my hand and drag me to my right direction and help me find solace.. But no one holds my hand :( I have always heard since my childhood that we don’t act according to our wishes, God makes us to act according to His wishes and we are the mere puppets in His control to dance on His tunes. Well, if this is so true, God, please answer me, is it the plan for me before dumping me here? Was ‘Luck/Fortune’ never on my list in your planned spreadsheet for my life? How can you be so irresponsible while penning down my life history? Oh Puhleez.. Don’t tell me that it is because of your Karma/Deeds of your past life..God, if you are telling this, trust me this is a bad excuse for your careless execution of my life chart. My grand mom said that we are here to face everything in this life for our good and bad deeds as well, and there is no carry forward for our deeds to our next life like our left over vacations to be used in next year cycle. Do you people (oops read Gods) have rating system too? Then God you must be screwed up in your appraisal for mishandling/carelessly scripting my life chart. My grand mom could’ve scripted my life chart much better than you, she’s better at work than you God.

God, please rework on my life spreadsheet and make necessary changes to help me lead my life easily. I am fed up and tired of being unfortunate every time. Please help me and listen to my words :) .. In spite of such mistakes by you, I Love You!!! :) and I have faith in you.

Hang On or Move On ??

Love on the web..Yeah this is the new love style that is gripping the youngsters. The best part of this web love is that there is no age bar.. anyone can fall in love with anyone. It creates a virtual ‘YOU’ and you keep on portraying the same. The movie ‘ You’ve got mail’ once created a rage which was on the same concept of web love.Teenage guys, college-goers and even kids are net savvy. They keep visiting the chat room regularly to know more strangers and feel that they are into some relationship with the person they are chatting for some 2-3 months continuously. This concept was stolen by Channel-V LoveNet, yet another show which tried to become a hit like Emotional Atyachaar of UTV Bindaas.

When I first saw the show, I was really surprised to see how far people can go just to come on television. The motive of the show is to catch how many lies each party has delivered to the other. It is really a pity to see the VJ’s Manish and Alisha who hosts the show. The guy with his weird hair-do thinks himself as cool and in sync with the generation. If this is what they call ‘Dude’, its better to go back to Shammi Kapoor era. The lady grabs no attention as well, not worth mentioning!

The girl meets the guys friend and tries to dig out all rubbish and nasty things about the guy and the guy does the same thing. The queries make them look more foolish. The funniest part is when the guy/gal gets into each other’s room to investigate (Don’t know what they really try to investigate like a CID officer).. they start investigating their bathrooms(For God Sake...Only Hussain has the rights to enter with Harpic ;)), closet and come out with pants with a big hole, gents boxer in girl’s closet, porn dvd’s,ex-bf’s, ex-gf’s lovey-dovey cards(cheesy words,sugar coated love that can make you feel suffocated !! :O).

The show ends with the grand finale where both the parties meet each other. And yes nobody meets anyone’s expectations. The guy always expects the girl to be a Katrina Kaif and the girl wishes the guy to be a macho man like Salman Khan. All the dreams get washed away and in no time they end up in ugly fight. They start abusing each other which reflects the mentality of our young generation. Their mouths are stuffed with slangs and they use it with the same ease like greeting someone (wtf !!!). The hosts interrupt their conversation when the show time is about to wind up and asks them to make a choice which seems like a life-death situation. ‘Hang On or Move On ??’

This show piles up with other gross reality shows which only misleads. The virgin feeling of love is displayed in sleazy manner which alters the meaning of the pure, divine, larger than life like feeling called love.

Puhleeeezzz... ban such shows !!

Someone's watching you... Be careful !

Be careful ! Camera’s watching you !!

Yes... the camera of the team from Emotional Atyachaar, UTV Bindaas. This new show has taken the television industry by storm. The latest hit among youngistaan where everyone wants a loyalty test done on their partners. Lovers are scared to meet any new guy/gal in town fearing the presence of hidden camera behind them.

Is the show justified? Are they really trying to help the lovers or is it a ploy to increase their TRP’s? It is surprising to see the obscene footage on TV. This show creates a doubt in the minds of the lovers. Every lover is now more careful when interacting with any stranger. The host, Angad Bedi adds more spice in creating an aura of doubt, confusion and disbelief. He got more popularity for this show and is now a part of the DLF-IPL hosts. Truely, this show worked for him... atleast someone gained apart from the producers of the show , rest actors/ crew members got only kisses and more intimacy from stangers. Sakshi Pradhan,Annie,Rahul from the Splitsvilla fame are the part of the crew.

I wonder how the people who are put to test do not recognise them. But yeah, the crew do have a nice time having free kisses and lots more legally... what else do we expect from a Sakshi Pradhan, a girl who can sell her flesh just to get name and fame.. Celebs like the gross,jerk,playboy from the famous reality show Big Boss, Raja Chaudhary are put on this loyalty test. There was no doubt on his obvious behaviour and failed his loyalty test.

This is a nice platform to catch the frauds who play with the emotions of their partners. It is a hi-fi style of break-up between partners.This show was meant to raise ruckus among the masses. It will gain more popularity if it keeps its credibility without misleading youngsters.

Way to go Emotional Atyachaar !!

One fine morning...

Hearing the alarm my eyes went wide open. I had never seen the dawn since the last four months. My eyes were burning terribly. I saw my mother sleeping beside me. My room mates were getting dressed up to rush for their office shuttle.

I entered their room with my drowsy eyes, my eyes were watering enough to bathe myself in it. I wished my room mates with a good morning note to which they didn’t bother to reciprocate, being too busy to look at the mirror admiring them selves.

‘How do I look?’ inquired Debashree in a light pink shirt and blue jeans.
‘Great!’ , immediately replied Smaranika, still busy tying up her pony.

I was feeling annoyed at their nonsensical queries at 7’O’ clock in the morning which was my dawn after long.

‘Are we looking OK?’, quizzed both of them with a raised eyebrow.
‘Beauty-FOOL’, I commented and left the room.

I went straight to the wash basin with my toothpaste in left hand and tooth brush in right hand.
Brushing my teeth, I was watching my mother sleeping inside the blanket. The urge of getting into the bed to sleep again was high on the nerves. However the fear of missing the training and the terror of my lady supervisor kept me awakened. I switched on the geyser and entered the bathroom lazily. The warm water soothed me and I was feeling revived.

Hurriedly I dressed up and sat down with a bowl of chocos and milk.

My friend was honking outside my house. I went out immediately and signaled him to wait. I covered my face with a black stole striking a resemblance to a terrorist of Al-Qaeda or some dreadful unidentified group. He was cursing me from within perhaps for waking him up so early to drop me at the office. He swallowed his anger and curses within, greeting me with a smile complimenting my formal attire.

I sat on the pillion while JP started his bike,Honda Unicorn… his only pride!

‘Traffic is horrible.’ I started the conversation.
He nodded his head justifying his agreement to my comment.
‘How many extra hours of sleep you had?’, he inquired.
‘Full one hour’, I replied gleaming with pride.

My sleep of extra one hour had worsened the start of his day and robbed his smile too. Meanwhile I was looking at my watch, calculating the time it will take to reach office.

He picked up high speed in the outer ring road gushing past every vehicle around us. I felt like flying high as if I was standing on one of the wing of the airplane. The heavy wind gushed past me making my vision blurred.
Ramping up the lanes, we reached office. I landed from his bike turned airplane and started walking towards the lobby.

On reaching the office, I went straight into the rest room to see myself in the mirror. There was a huge rush in front of the mirror with ladies carefully applying make-ups to hide their imperfections. They were busy praising each other. Few generous ladies were kind enough to lend their eye-liners, mascara and compact powders to their colleagues. Combing my hair, I rushed to my workstation to show my face to my supervisor making her aware of my presence.
I made myself comfortable in my seat and picked up my cell phone to call my buddy, Paran. Of late he has turned out to be my bus partner, lunch partner, gossip partner, bench partner.

‘Hey where are you?’ I queried.
‘Cafeteria. Come up near the chaiwala stall.’ replied Parandhaman. His name is enough to call it a tongue twister.
‘Yes, I’ll be there soon’ , I replied and hung up.
I dropped the idea of going to the cafeteria and started checking my mails.

Parandhaman came to my workstation after having his cup of morning tea. He usually takes three four cups of tea in a day. It was around 9:30 am and we had one more hour to go. We decided to spend the time gossiping on the bridge area between both the towers.

It was a lovely weather outside. We were standing on the 8th floor bridge area. Everything looked very serene. I could see the cars and bikes parked. They looked colorful and reminded me of toy cars and bikes which was a strong reason of enmity between me and my brother in our childhood. There was huge number of coconut tress planted in straight consecutive rows which resembled a mini Kerala.

We started discussing about our childhood days, difference in our culture. He takes pride being a Tamil and loves everything about his state. His face shone every time he described his home, culture. He knows all about the Tamil actors starting from their childhood to their bed stories. I enjoy listening to his stories, histories of Tamil Superstars.

Around 10:30 am we started walking towards the training room with a minimal interest to learn anything new and exciting. The training room was meant for 15 students. Since the count of the resource pool was much high, we had almost double the head counts.
Early birds were lucky to grab a seat for them selves. I was happy to get myself a seat in the last row corner seat. Few over enthusiastic guys were busy adjusting the screen and projector for the session.

I couldn’t figure out to whom they were buttering up. I felt pity on those guys.

Slowly the headcounts was increasing and whispers ran through out the room. We were expecting a trainer to enter, however it was a web seminar.

‘Just audio and video… no trainer!’, I smiled at myself.

The slide show was on with a recorded audio over the telephone. The voice was barely audible to the front liners. I again thanked myself for being a back bencher all my life. Sometimes it really helps though you never get noticed by the teachers for whom front benchers are the fore runners of the society. Somehow I feel those geeks are the real losers’ who remain nerdy all their life missing the fun.

I tried hard to push myself to gain concentration but my inner voice told me that it was worthless. I didn’t give a second try.

Immediately I obeyed my inner voice and started looking at the dumb audience. Everyone looked dull, pale, puzzled at their own presence in that worthless session. The room was dark with a projector flashing the light. Almost everyone was yawning and made an effort to check if someone has seen them yawning. It was really funny to see them dozing off and struggling hard to keep them selves awakened.

The worthless training which was scheduled for 3 hours condensed to 45 minutes and everyone came out of the room with a wide grin.

I was still Yawning!!!

Am i complicated ???

Human nature is unpredictable, confused… or is it only mine?? I really wonder at my complex-perplex nature. I keep whining about something every time and when I get the things done, I find myself dissatisfied. What do I really want? Do I fall under the complicated category? Well … Maybe yes! My friends do have a hard time understanding my so called complex-perplex nature. Hats off to their patience! (Applaud…)

Life keeps you wandering from one place to another, yet we have no complaints at it. Sometimes we get annoyed, pissed at it, blaming everything on our fate, destiny! When we do not get the results we want, we never blame ourselves for the cause, and we pass on the blame to fate and destiny. Few months back life was turmoil. My project delivery was called off without any prior notice. Since October I was on Resource Pool, a pool where resources are dumped to get staffed. The head count of resource pool was increasing at an alarming rate. The staffing team staffs resources anywhere they find a vacancy; they can hire you for a job of a cleaner even though you can develop a code of thousand lines. I was cursing myself for being there. I wanted to work, hated to see people yawning in my cubicle with no work. I kept praying religiously for a good offer in my old facility with a neat profile

After rejecting five offers from different project assignments with mismatch profile, risking my job, taking pains in convincing my staffing members, finally I am here into a project with another mismatch profile. Ironically I had no option but to accept it… Hey hold on.. I was never opinionated about my interest in this profile … Sigh! :( :( :(

My muscles, brain, bones were idle for four months… It is really painful for me to clean my rusted brain and bones. Now I can say that ‘ I miss my bench period’…It was a golden period where I spent barely five hours at office, completed my beauty sleep peacefully, boarding the backup shuttle to office, returning home in the intershuttle facility… oh how much I miss those days … :(

This facility at the outer ring road looks bright from the outer side. Owing to the space constraint, employees are placed closely to each other… enough to make you feel suffocated. I can definitely say ‘ I hate this place’.

My first encounter with my lead was fantastic which will be in my minds till my tenure here or may be till my death. A man in his late forties with a tone heavy enough to make your goose flesh stand on their ends. His attitude, behavioral aspects reminded me of ‘Virus’ from the latest flick, 3 Idiots. He kept querying me on technical side and none of my answers seemed to please him. ‘Surrender’, I thought myself and he kept firing at me endlessly. I left the room mentally injured. I met my manger who seemed to be a nice, young man in his mid thirties. He made me understand the profile and somehow I was convinced… I don’t know it was his words, convincing nature or his charming personality that made me convinced in fifteen minutes of discussion. :) :) :)

This is what I yearned for the last four months. Now I have work, I have work station, team, manager, leads and lots to be added to this list… What is the thing that keeps me upset, yet again? Why I am not satisfied? I don’t understand the facets of my life. I keep pondering whether it happens with everyone or is it just me who has to struggle all the time…. Sigh!!! :( :(

Does anyone have answer to my questions? Can anyone help me out?